On this, the 9th anniversary of the attack on the World Trade Center and the assassination of 2,977 civilians, I pause to reflect on what got us to that point and why we have only moved backward from that day.

Suffering is a human condition; it is not the domain of any one country or tribe of people. We inflict it on each other both indiscriminately and with intent, thus creating a circle of pain and anger and retribution. But out of suffering comes great compassion and generosity, yes?

When I think of the tremendous sacrifice of the fireman, police, and civilians throughout New York, the country, and the world, I wonder why that did not stay as the focus of this terrible day. To let this event dictate a path of war, hatred, fear, and anti-community-centers-2-blocks-from-Ground-Zero does a great disservice to all the people who suffered and/or died trying to help a stranger, save a life, or provide the dead with a little dignity in the days and weeks following the attack.

So today, instead of declaring your nationalism at the top of your voice, honor those who gave everything by reaching out to someone you wouldn’t normally acknowledge and by finding it in your heart to hate a little less and love a little more.